Sting Operation

The old adage “What happens in Vegas ends up on ColeTries.com” rings true today. During my latest very important business trip (don’t forget, I’m a very important businessman), I embarked on some other very important business: grabbing dinner with my friend and coworker, Jim, who wished to share his thoughts on 2001: A Space Odyssey after reading my post about it.

Knowing Jim reads the blog, I suggested we also try something adventurous during our outing. I’d already conquered the Skyjump on my previous trip, so we chose something less intimidating but, somehow, just as nervewracking.

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If you excuse the reflection of my camera’s flash and the myriad shadows cascading the image, you’ll note the “World Famous Scorpion Shot!” headline. Jim and I ended up at Nacho Daddy in Planet Hollywood’s Miracle Mile ready to ingest pickled scorpions. We placed our orders and contemplated the logistics of such a daring feat:

“Would the scorpion taste weird?”

“How soon before appearing in my shot did the scorpion die?”

“Is it ever a good idea to drink tequila?”

The answers, in case you’re wondering, are yes, at least a few days, and 99 percent of the time, no. This situation represents the 1 percent. Our scorpions arrived, and I skittishly poked my dead lil guy off the lime into the abnormally large tequila shot, mentally battled with why I thought this was a good idea, and did the deed:

Scorpions may sting, but tequila burns. And while the scorpion’s stinger had been removed some days before he ever ended up in my glass, the tequila’s flame had not. That, by far, stung the most, and after I wallowed in my regret, I realized I didn’t feel the scorpion going down one bit.

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Jim approached the shot differently. I knew this would happen because just before doing it, he said: “I’m going to approach the shot differently.” He lightly picked up the scorpion and popped it into his mouth, chewing three or four times before swallowing the creature.

“Hm. Very little taste at all.” To Jim, the now-harmless scorpion tasted like nothing at all. He followed that with his shot and we enjoyed our dinner.

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Moral of the story: if you’re me, you’re likely to be more scared of doing a scorpion shot than is reasonable. If you’re anyone else, I have no idea what you’re likely to do. But I’ve done a scorpion shot. So there.

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